So, Pooh Bear is still breastfeeding at almost 16 months and I think we are going to try for the golden two year mark. I say ‘golden’ since it is at least the age at which the World Health Organisation says you should aim to breastfeed to in the western world.
I have been wondering if we should be offering him more alternative drinks to my milk in a bid to encourage self-weaning. He has water and juice throughout the day like his older brother and he has the very, very occasional couple of ounces of cow’s milk every now and then. He rarely feeds in public as he’s too busy bombing around to snuggle up to Mummy but he does have a good feed at any support groups I attend. I think this is because of the ‘Corrie Effect’ as I call it. What, you’ve never heard of the ‘Corrie Effect’?
Cor-rie Eff-ect 1. When the phrase “I’ll make a brew” is uttered on Coronation Street thus making the viewer crave a cup of the good stuff themselves.
They’re always catching me with that and babies it seems are the same. They see one breastfeeding and they all have to do it!
I have been feeling more and more nervous about having to feed him outside of the safety of the groups and our home in case we attract negative comments in public. I’m not sure how I would react and I know it would upset and anger me if anything out of turn was said. It would be one of those infuriating moments where you just sit there quiet and gobsmacked then think of a witty retort 3 hours later and forever play it over in your head torturing yourself.
Anyway, the point of this post was to say that I had two absolutely, genuinely lovely comments about me continuing to feed Pooh Bear. Where all around you, breastfeeding is not seen as the normal way to feed your baby and god forbid you feed them much longer than six months, it was a real confidence boost and has spurred me on to continue as long as Pooh Bear wants.
We HAVE to keep reminding ourselves that they are only small for such a short time and it is no big sacrifice to keep going a bit longer. There is always the risk of attracting negative comments but that is true of so many parenting issues. And anyone who says Mums are selfish for continued breastfeeding really have NO clue what it is like to feed a toddler. Mostly rewarding yet frustrating, tiring and sometimes painful (See my earlier post, Twiddles, Fidgets and a Kick in the Face)
I also feel it is important for people to see Pooh Bear feeding. I would never have thought about feeding a toddler before I had children so by seeing toddlers feed in support groups especially, it is empowering other women to themselves feed as long as they and their children want and not how long society thinks is best.
I’m also pretty stubborn and if someone says I shouldn’t be doing something I want to blow a raspberry in their face and do it anyway. Perhaps not the best reason to continue to breastfeed but since it’s not damaging anyone, and in fact has major health benefits for both of us, why not!
If you are feeding your toddler, why not put this fabulous logo in your side bar. It was designed by Peaceful Parenting and was brought to my attention by More Than Milk on their facebook page.
If you are looking for some support with regards to continued breastfeeding there are some lovely bloggers and online support/information groups dishing out confidence and support in spades.
If you think breastfeeding ONE toddler is a challenge, you MUST pop over to Twinkle Mummy who is enjoying the trials and tribulations of feeding her twin boys Spud & Sprout
Dispelling Breastfeeding Myths - Facebook & Site
Circus Queen - Breastfeeding Beyond One is Not Just for Mum
Plus 2.4 - When Should Extended Breastfeeding End?
My Mummy’s Pennies - Breastfeeding, a Mother’s Choice
Breastfeeding in England – The Highs and Lows of Tandem Nursing
Analytical Armadillo - Facebook & Site
The Leaky Boob - Facebook & Site
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Great post Kate and thanks for linking to mine! :0) I love the corrie effect reference , so true! E always feeds when we are at groups!
Despite being very proud to still be feeding E, I also shared that nervousness about feeding her outside of ‘safe’ places such as home or groups, We are going away to a holiday park at the end of the month so are likely to be out and about in the evening when she usually feeding, the positive comments and support I have read on breastfeeding posts this week has given me a lot more confidence about feeding here then. Thanks for the confidence boost…
My pleasure :) We went to Pontins a couple of weeks ago and I was a bit nervous about feeding him but he was so busy and nosy he saved up feeding until we got home and by the second day, had me sat feeding him in bed most of the evening :D Funny how they always seem to catch up somehow. Good luck and let me know how it goes x
Well done! Breastfeeding a toddler is quite an accomplishment and you’re so brave to continue to breastfeed in public. I haven’t breastfed Spud and Sprout in public since they were tiny but this is more to do with the logistics of tandem feeding rather than peoples reactions. I imagine that a lot more Mums breastfeed toddlers than one would realise as they tend to do it behind closed doors, which is a real shame. I don’t think I would have continued to breastfeed for as long as I have (18 months and still going) if I hadn’t see other mums breastfeeding their toddlers. Not only does it normalise it but it also makes it seem achievable.
Breastfeeding Spud and Sprout is becoming increasingly difficult but I’m still plodding along. Previously I have set goals to reach 6 weeks, 16 weeks, 6 months and a year. I haven’t a goal now mainly because I don’t want to let myself down but also partly because I feel I’ve done my bit and I’m just giving them chance to wean themselves naturally. I don’t know whether I’ll make it to 2 years but I just keep taking one day at a time.
You are doing amazingly well! I find it difficult on occasion giving up my personal space just feeding one toddler so you must have it twice as bad – you do get twice the appreciation too though :D Tandem feeding is something I would love to do but it’s looking less likely that I will be able to cross it off my list. No plans for a third baby just yet. Completely understand the difficult logistics in tandem feeding. I bet since you have twins, there’s the curious factor where people are just damn right nosey and can imagine that can be a bit daunting if you are trying to feed a distracted toddler. Contrary to popular belief, we breastfeeding mums DON’T like flashing our nipples :D
Exactly the right attitude. Setting yourself a goal can most definitely be as simple as getting through the next feed especially in the very beginning. I’m quite competitive even with myself so I don’t think I’ll be fully satisfied unless we get to age 2 but if he weans on his own terms then I’ll be happy enough. He doesn’t seem the least bit ready to stop at the moment so we’ll plod on.
Im still feeding my 18month old Froggy and we love it! We’re both happy with it and i don’t care! His face lights up when it’s boobies time and we are so close because of it!
Love it AND the name Froggy :) I love the reaction I get from Pooh Bear two. He laughs and giggles in my face after a feed then does a little happy spin and dance around the room too!
Thanks for including me, lovely. Great post and gorgeous picture. I’ve actually laughed when people suggest that I’m continuing for me (and it has happened more than once!). I suppose on some level it is for me.
Those critics aren’t around at 3am when she wakes and I’ve got a choice between rolling over and breastfeeding her and getting out of bed for an hour to do whatever it is non-breastfeeding mums do to get their little ones to sleep.
Weaning her wouldn’t remove her needs but it would certainly make it more hectic for me to meet her needs and probably even make her more “needy” by removing something so immunity-boosting and comfort-giving!
My pleasure, you are always worth including :) I definitely don’t know how we’d cope without breastfeeding at night. Not too bad if you have one baby crying but when you have an older child too, you don’t want the little one waking them up. I can honestly say, we’ve NEVER had one night where a boob in the face hasn’t ensured the boys have gone straight back to sleep.
I think what you’re doing is fantastic! I wish I’d had the opportunity to feed my toddler & if I saw you in the street I’d congratulate you on such a fabulous journey. I will use you as inspiration for feeding my next baby! (if we ever conceive it!)
Aaww, that’s so lovely of you to say. That’s exactly what breastfeeding advocacy is all about. Empowering women and just letting them know that it’s about them and their baby not societies skewed ideals. Best of luck with baby number two, I will keep a look out for some fantastic news on your blog. I have found that if you forget about conceiving and have the odd tipsy night out, miracles happen ;)
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Love this. So encouraging when all we get is, so, when are you going to stop feeding? And little one is only ten months!
Each time someone says it have a little prepared speech about the benefits, the who advice etc. Only I’ve never used it. Not once.
I Need to man up but am too scared what peoples response will be… Sad isn’t it?!
It is sad and if people understood what it’s like to breastfeed a toddler (not always a bed of roses) and also the benefits, they might be more accepting. I can see so many reasons to continue but none to stop! Don’t feel bad you don’t feel comfortable fighting a battle everytime you are questioned. You shouldn’t have to justify yourself to others when it’s actually none of their business. We can help ‘the cause’ by supporting others and empowering women who want to listen. x